[personal profile] hermione527
So today is my second day off Facebook, and I must say, it is quieting my mind and helping me to better focus on my dissertation and job search. I feel a little bit disconnected, but not completely, as I am still on Twitter and Instagram and see plenty of people in person. I'm hoping people will text me about fun goings-on. For instance, there's a comics cosplay event at Battle and Brew in Sandy Springs next weekend. I'm interested in going, so I might have to, wow, email people instead of posting on Facebook about it to convince people to go with me. If anything, this is a test to see who my real friends are and who will make an actual effort to keep in touch with me. I figure if I only see some of my close friends about once a month, maybe even bi-monthly, then some of my Facebook "friends" can go a month without seeing me on there. Plus, AERA, Twitter, the president of the University I now attend and work at, and NCTE have all recently made statements regarding the immigrant band and/or Betsy DeVos's nomination, so I figure I'll let people with actual power make these statements for now and focus on my own work and writing. I can make a difference by writing to my local officials, which I have, and teaching and working on my dissertation. My dissertation is written from a feminist perspective, so DT and his puppet masters probably would not like it. I am trying to use my anger in a productive way and write my dissertation in part to spite them, in addition to hopefully helping others.

I had a productive therapy session today. My therapist said that about 90 percent of her patience have had heightened anxiety since DT came to power, so I'm glad to hear that I am not alone. I told her about Friday night, when the 18 year old Frat boys who live next door to me and have DT stickers on their pick-up trucks were really drunk, cussing a lot on the patio, and essentially keeping me from working on my dissertation. I felt threatened, curled up in my guest room, and felt like I was going to have a panic attack. So I booked a cheap hotel room the next day in a nearby city, which gave me some goddamn peace and quiet. I saw friends that night and went to a UU Fellowship the next day and did a great interview, all of which helped me feel better. My therapist thinks that both me listening to my instincts and knowing I needed to leave and logging off Facebook were good signs that I'm learning to be in tuned to my emotions and act accordingly. She thinks that logging of Facebook is actually a sign of assertiveness because I do not want to be a part of toxic political conversations. I mean, I already know that our country is going in the direction of fascism. I don't need to be reminded of that ten times a day. Lucky for me, I have family and friends fairly close by and live in a liberal university community, so I'll be fine. I just want to do what I can to protect others who might not be.

Tomorrow will be another day, and it will be cold, but beautiful. I look forward to discussing feminist theory for my informal directed study, working on service work for one of my committees, and of course dissertation. Wednesday I must prepare a conference presentation. I have enough to keep me busy, and now I can go home and unwind over a little bit of TV. I have had more time these past couple of days, in a good way.



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